The Final Days

It is now my last week of my practicum in Uganda and I am more than a little sensitive about it. It's going to be so tough to start saying goodbyes. I'm not good at goodbyes to begin with but this is just too much. I said goodbye to Courtney yesterday because I won't see her until we are back in Canada and that was a wake up call. Then I started packing my bags today which made it even more real. The closer I have gotten to the end, the less prepared I have felt to leave. This experience cannot be summed up in a blog entry, and I am sure I am repeating myself, but there truly are no words to describe what I have gained in these 10 weeks. But I will give it a good try with this final post.

The one thing that has been consistently clear to me since the day I arrived is that I was meant to be here. I have never been more sure of anything. Any discomfort I may have experienced in the beginning only confirmed how important this was going to be for me. I needed to throw myself into this head first and do my best not to drown and I think I have done a pretty good job with that. I can't imagine being anywhere else but here and there is no better feeling than that. Coming to Uganda has taught me things that I couldn't have figured out any other way and I will be forever grateful for that. The people here keep thanking me for what I have done at my practicum and how happy they have been to have us there and I honestly don't think they understand how much they have contributed to my life. It's so wonderful to have made an impact and to know that the families I have met here will never forget me or the time that the mzungu visited their home. But that is not why I came here and I don't want any credit. These people will never know how much I appreciate them. I have really been so emotional lately that I am actually fearing I'll make a fool of myself on my last day of practicum and turn into a blubbering mess when I say my goodbyes. My coworkers are like a family and they have really accepted me with open arms so it will be really heartbreaking to leave. And one thing I have noticed here is that it's not a norm to cry in front of people and unfortunately crying in front of people is one of my special talents. So wish me luck as i try my best to keep it together this week. What puts me at ease is knowing that some day, some how I will come back to Uganda. I think I knew even after my first two weeks that I was too invested here to one day walk away and never come back.

I wish I could say more. Sometimes I think I could write a book about my experience and some days I am at a loss for words because there really is no way to explain what I wish I could explain. My life has been altered by my time in Uganda. It's a bold statement but it is the only way I can describe it. In the best ways possible I have just changed. I have learnt so much about myself by being here; it's been a roller coaster of self discovery. I have had moments of pure bliss, moments of sadness, moments of anger and frustration, and moments of over the top happiness. I honestly wouldn't change any bit of any of it because it has been the greatest learning experience of my life. I feel so lucky to have had this opportunity at such a young age because I can see how many doors it has opened for me already. If any future Uganda Project students are reading this blog I hope you realise that all the things people have told you about how Uganda will change your life are completely true. One day you will arrive at your last week and you may only be able to describe the experience as simply as a life changing one. In some ways I feel as if my life is just beginning because I don't know where I would have ended up if I hadn't come here. This trip was part of my path and I am excited to see where life takes me next. Wherever it is, I am up for the challenge.